Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Meanest Mom Ever Award

Yes, I received this award yet again over the weekend!  It is not hard to believe I have the longest running streak yet.  Almost 20 years to be exact!  So, now I am going to explain why...
1.  Actually, I have to admit this is a very selfish reason, to save face.  No one ever wants to hear, "those _________(last name, not expletive) children are out of control."  The short of it is, I want my children to make me look good.  I have enough issues of my own, that cause me to fall short of the perfection I  strive for.  I know, silly as it may be, I want  other people to think all is under control etc.  I want my friends to think I am a good mom.   Why is that? We all know that unfortunately, children make their own decisions, much to our dismay.  We cannot force them to make the right choice, oh yeah, I think that was Satan's plan.  (why is it that his plan is sometimes so appealing?)   I try not to judge others for the choices their children make.  We try our best to teach them, and sometimes they just make stupid mistakes, just like we did when we were their age... And still do. Yes, note to self, never judge a parent, (or child) for their child (or parent's) decision.  We all make our own choices therefore resulting in our own consequences.  At the seminary fireside on Sunday, Pres. Packer quoted Romney, (I think) "We must teach  not to be understood, but so that we cannot be misunderstood."
2.  I want my children to grow up to be amazing, adults.  I have high expectations for them, and I want them to be better than me. I want them to be smart, compassionate, grateful, respectful, spiritual, wise, humble, successful, responsible, etc.  I want them to know all the answers, do all the right things, learn everything they need to, and not get hurt.  I really do want the very best for my children, and hope they can see that even through my meanness.  I really am trying to help them achieve all those things, and I expect so much from them, it probably isn't even realistic.  But I still want it. 

Even if I continue to receive the award for the meanest mom ever, I will not back off.  I will continue to help my children be all those things previously mentioned.  To me, it is proof that I love them, and want the best for them.  Yes, they do need to learn to work, do well in school, have curfews, text me where they are and who they are with.  They need to wake up early to read scriptures, go to seminary, come to FHE, make dinner, clean, etc.  I just hope by the time they leave my home, they will know that I really do love them, and am not trying to make life miserable, but actually wonderful in the long run.
And by the way, this parent thing is really really difficult!  And I have some really great kids despite their mother!

Good Things:
1.  high expectations
2.  my children
3.  being a parent

9 comments:

bcrandall said...

And I realize that all this is true, if only it were easy to teach those things. I am following in your footsteps. Jaxon told me "I hate you" twice today. And I also think it is true that the parents that maybe have the highest expectations, or demands also have the most love because they know that the children can do just that. At least that is what I tell myself..regularly.

Wendy said...

Glad to know I'm in good company....I'm in the meanest mom group too :)

mkamye said...

For the record, I don't think anyone has ever said "Those Koenig kids are out of control!" You have some pretty great kids! You must be doing something right!

The Fallon Schank's said...

I am a charter member of "the meanest mom ever club". :) Good things: No dues!

kate said...

Your kids are so lucky to have you!

Amy said...

Terra! You are wonderful, compassionate, kind, respectful, etc. I love you and thnk you are an amazing mom! Definitely an amazing friend! Get all the kinks work out so when I am dealing with my kids, you will have all the answers for me. Read my blog.. You will get a good laugh!

Carters said...

Wow! I needed to hear that since I just got asked NOT to go on tour with my girls because they think I am too bossy. Hmmm....a great thing to blog. Thanks for the inspiration.

agratefulheart said...

Keep up the good work! Parenting is not for the faint of heart:) is it?

Sue said...

if you have to be mean to be the kind of mom you are...then where do i sign up?!